Divorce and custody cases create a lot of turmoil. The end result is a new schedule you and your child have to live by, which probably includes parenting time with the other parent. Your child is going to be on the move a lot more and your quiet little home life may not be so quiet anymore. Adjusting to a parenting schedule is difficult but it is possible to create a new normalcy in your home that will help your child feel calm and adjusted. Here are a few tips to help you do this.
- Accept that the new normal is not the same as the old normal and you can never go back. Many big changes like this are hard in the beginning, but as you live with the new plan, it will become comfortable.
- Model the right behavior. If you make it clear you are struggling to adjust and hate the new schedule, your child is going to follow suit. If instead you can show that you are cheerfully adjusting, you will show your child the best way to adapt.
- Create a schedule and stick to it. The best way to get used to things is to have a new routine that you follow regularly. It will soon feel normal if you stay with it.
- Build in downtime. Things get crazy when you’re rushing from school to activities to dropping your kid off with your ex. The new schedule is incorporating a lot of new drop offs and pick-ups and your child is more scheduled than ever. You need to make sure there is plenty of quiet time at home to counter the new craziness.
- Give your child access to the schedule. Put it up on a wall calendar or put it into your child’s phone. Letting him or her see exactly how it plays out goes a long way towards making it acceptable and routine.
- Talk about the changes. Give your child the opportunity to talk about how he or she feels and what impact the parenting plan has.
DeTorres & DeGeorge handles child custody cases in Hunterdon, Somerset and Warren counties in New Jersey and surrounding areas. Call us now to schedule your consultation.