Living Together After Your Relationship Ends

It is not uncommon to find yourself in the position of breaking up with your partner, but being unable to physically separate because you can’t afford to, have nowhere to go, or your attorney has advised you not to leave. How then do you make a difficult situation livable?

  • Schedule parenting time. If you have children, it may be useful to start to divide your time, so you can have individual time with them. This may also help set the stage for a custody plan, so be sure to arrange things so you spend a lot of time with your kids.
  • Designate areas. You may have to stay in the same home, but you can set up zones. You can create separate sleeping and living zones but may have to share a kitchen and bathroom. If necessary, set up a schedule for kitchen and bathroom use so you can minimize contact with each other.
  • Decrease contact. The more you talk, the more you are likely to disagree. Silence is your friend. Refusing to get into arguments can make life a lot easier.
  • Set up house rules. A list of agreed upon rules can decrease arguing and make sharing a residence a lot easier. They have to be rules you both agree to however. Put them in writing and post them.
  • Separate finances. You each need your own bank account and credit cards and need to figure out how to pay rent/mortgage and utilities in a fair way. Try to talk through these decisions and come to a compromise if possible that will work for the time being. Food can be paid for separately. Children’s expenses should be shared.
  • Know when to pull the plug. If things are getting too volatile or you are too uncomfortable, it’s time for someone to move out.

Contact DeTorres & DeGeorge for help with divorce or separation in New Jersey.

Divorce Guide
About DeTorres and DeGeorge Family Law

DeTorres and DeGeorge Family Law is a New Jersey based family law firm that has been helping New Jersey residents achieve the best possible results in their divorce for nearly 30 years. The DeTorres and DeGeorge Family Law team is always ready to fight for their clients’ rights – determined to help New Jersey families overcome legal challenges from start to finish. Our legal team, with over 65 years of combined experience, provides expert guidance on all family law and divorce-related matters, including custody and parenting time, alimony and child support, equitable distribution of assets, premarital agreements, post-divorce issues, executive compensation distribution, divorces for business owners, and divorce mediation. The firm has been recognized for its dedication and expertise in the industry by multiple local and national organizations, including Super Lawyers, Law Firm 500, and the American Institute of Family Law Attorneys. Rosanne DeTorres, Managing Partner, is one of 150 lawyers certified as a matrimonial law attorney.

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