The New Year is a time for a fresh start in all aspects of your life. If you are divorced and have children you are co-parenting with an ex-spouse, add these to your list of New Year resolutions:
- Don’t ask your children to give messages to your ex. Doing this puts your child in the middle of your conflict and challenging emotions. If you have something to say to your ex, say it yourself.
- Make an effort to ignore when your ex pushes your buttons. You can’t control what your ex says to you, but you can definitely control how you respond to it. It’s not easy to bite your lip, but doing so can significantly ease tensions.
- Decide to be generous. Maybe there is a little wiggle room on things like pick up times and required notifications. Give what you wish to receive and you may be surprised to find that your relationship improves.
- Realize there are some things you cannot change. You will never change your ex or his or her behavior. So maybe it’s time to stop trying to and time to stop stressing about it.
- Remember the future. You and your ex are going to be parents together for the rest of your life. If you want the future to be calm and happy, you can start to try to change things now so that little by little that future can become your reality.
- Put your child first. Co-parenting is all about making sure your child has time and meaningful relationships with both parents. Your child needs should drive the entire co-parenting engine. Stay focused on that and little annoyances become easier to manage.
DeTorres & DeGeorge is ready to help you with your divorce or family law case. Make an appointment today.